#10: Garrison Keillor will finally stop making cheap political digs and get back to being genuinely funny.
#9: Black leaders who capitalized on racial victimhood, especially the Rev. Al Sharpton, temporarily stunned into silence.
#8: Empty rhetoric will finally settle down while Obama administration desperately tries to diminish expectations.
#7: International community, long used to demonizing the U.S. as evil white oppressor, temporarily obliged to be nice to us again.
#6: After a couple of days of congratulating themselves, liberals will finally have nothing to talk about.
#5: U.S. will finally get out this war, but someone else will have to deal with the consequences of ending it.
#4: Hey, it's only money, anyway . . . it's not like you can take it with you when you retire.
#3: Feel smug knowing the country was not as racist as everyone made it out to be.
#2: Maybe the "Party of Ideas" will finally get a clue, and get back to the principles that once made it great: fiscal responsibility, smaller government, lower taxes, education, and equal opportunity for all.
And the number one way conservatives can console themselves about the election . . .